love yourself bethenny frankel naturally thin

Learn to Love Yourself

How can you not love yourself, when you are all you know? You have ultimate access because you are inside your own head and you can make yourself into the best possible version of yourself. But you have to care about yourself, take care of yourself, and love yourself, by doing what is truly good for you.

It’s great to have friends, a family, a life partner who care about you – sure. But none of that is going to work very well if you don’t care about yourself first. Put yourself and your own needs ahead of everything else, and you’ll begin to see why this is the only way you can then turn around and be a good friend, a good family member, a good parent, a good partner. Loving yourself has to be at the very heart of everything you do.

This is really hard for some people because they are so used to putting themselves last. But that’s not going to get you anything other than feeling miserable and bad. Then you compensate by developing unhealthy habits like overeating or substance abuse.

It may take a while, but start doing little things for yourself every day. Always give yourself at least fifteen uninterrupted minutes of “you time.” Do little things for yourself throughout the day: have a piece of fruit; go for a walk; take a break from your work to breathe deeply; eat a square of dark chocolate; or just sit in a hammock. Give someone a hug. Hold your boyfriend’s hand. All these little things will help you learn how to take care of yourself, and care grows into love.

You get one life. You deserve to make it the best it can be, so figure out what you need, what you want, and who you want to be.

Then be.

This is an excerpt from Naturally Thin by Bethenny Frankel, available on